impending lingerie pillow fights

Wow, Maggie... I can't help but feel for your kid, it's gonna be all down hill from here for him, poor bastard.

So it’s 11:32pm as I begin this entry.

There is actually something very cool about staring at an empty white page BEFORE I dirty it with random thoughts of no real consequence pieced together in no distinct order.

I operate on the theory that if you write 1000 pages or post 100 entry’s then, at least a few will be interesting. And so it is... 11:34 and I’m “all in”...

My friend Leslie (LBO aka Maverick) and Sarah C, (the weasel aficionado) are taking the WIF to a Rainbow bar for her birfday this year, which is coming up on October 12^th...

Now, this is disturbing on so many levels, and very cool... I’ll explain and you decide. Actually don’t, my life if Fucked up enough w/o listening to anyone else’s BS. I import Reptiles for a living for Christ’s sake...

First off, this was the WIF’s idea... no problem there... And I have a theory that everyone’s just a wee bit queer, so I’m certainly open to her exploring different parts of her world, I mean... I mean I been to the Rainbow clubs with “LBO” before and it was a good time... The “rainbows” know how to party for sure... That being said, their taste in music, not so good.... That was a generalization and I’m sure it’s wrong ¾’s of the time – sorry rainbows...

I’ll get back to the WIF’s impending lingerie pillow fights...

She asked a few of my/our friends to this shindig (all beautiful and talented ladies I might add), namely a Gecko Goddess, my Rainbow Connection, and a Finance Queen who again happens to be a weasel aficionado... I love all these ladies, and I tell all of them way too much about my life... Way too fucking much, so having them all in the same room scares the hell out of me, much less having all of them in the same room at a lesbian bar where I am NOT on a Saturday fucking night... drinking no less...

It’s kinda like in high school at a school assembly in the gym and you look up, and inevitably behind you, and there are like 4 of your ex girlfriends all sitting together, and they all look at you and wave, and you're like “fuck” “fuck, fuckety, fuck, fuck, fuck....”

I will need some Valium here in a minute.

And she’s staying with Les (aka Mav/LBO) in Dallas that night...

As luck would have it GG or KK (she’s asked me to use it once – initials thing, add another K and we’re in dangerous territory can’t do it) uhhh, she has a reptile show in Chicago that weekend, and will miss out... (BONUS), but now they’re planning on two, yup that’s right, two trips to gay mecca, one for the WIF’s birfday, and one just “girls night” when all four can plot, plan, sip martini’s, talk shit, and pick up hot women, and I am jealous!

That I won’t be there.

It’s kind of the George Costanza rule of relationships... Separate worlds equal happy worlds, as long as they aren’t too separate and the happy isn’t too happy... You know what I mean. I’ll probably be home in my boxers on the couch eating a block of cheddar cheese, or...... well... whatever

Now, this being her birthday wish and me not being invited does lead me to a few conclusions.

Conc#1

I need to make a trip to the “spy store” TOMORROW and send LBO a "Teddy Bear" as a thank you for all she’s done to help us out whilst WIF was ill....

Conc#2

Maybe this is a good thing, not just the –Teddy Gram- but the fact that WIF doesn’t want me around for her birfday celebration, maybe it means:

1. I'm gonna get laid - eventually or
   
2. she hates me
3. she like girls
4. she might like girls and hate me
5. she may just be teasing me about liking girls and doesn’t hate me all the time
6. she may want to get jiggy again maybe even with me at some point
7. I just had to add “jiggy” to the dictionary in MS word...
8. She NEEDS her space AS MUCH as I do!!! Fucking great!

And now on to a few things I know... And a few things I think I know...

Britney Spears can't be that fucking stupid, can she?

Jenna Bush Can't be that Fucking smart, can she?

GWB vetoed a bipartisan bill TODAY which would continue to provide federal funding for the SCHIP program. (State Children's Health Insurance Program)

This federally funded program provided health insurance via the states to uninsured children and some under insured children.

His rationale for the veto was that the SCHIP program is excessive government spending on a social program and that some of the people receiving the added insurance don’t actually need it as, as they could afford the care without the federal programs help....

Last week GWB asked Robert Gates to ask Congress for another budget supplemental of $191, 000000000.00 for the continuation of the Iraq War....

Finally, The new Eef Barzelay album is great - check out his myspace page www.myspace.com/eefbarzelay

I love my WIF

SHE loves me

Things are tough... So what...

Happy Birthday – go get em tiger!

ME-fucking-OW....

Don’t drink too much, have fun AND...

I wouldn’t wear the prom dress.