Republicans ARE queer!

Look, I realize that by just using that title for this entry, I am painting with a very broad brush. I'm actually using a republican tactic, that since 1996 or so has really worked for them. The drill is this: Make outlandish statements using a few examples and stay on message.

It WORKS! Let's try it...

What I'm getting at is this... No one party - Republican, Democrat, Libertarian (not even a possibility) Socialist, Green, Cat-Fuckers...etc - should control all three branches of our government at any given time. The framers would have been smart to throw something in the constitution to that effect, but they didn't. They didn't forsee Karl Rove... He's basically a sane methodical, genie from the future with flesh colored hair, but he's - no doubt - up to no good...

Now, any Republican who happens to come upon this site will likely assume I have a bit of a weak understanding of how our government actually works, I enjoy these debates, so bring it on fuckers....

To my Liberal compatriots, I may be preaching to the choir, but we need a message and we need to stay on that message no matter what.... Republicans are queer!
I'm gonna catch shit for that - get it....

Someone says to you: "Liberals are godless, cut and run, babykilling, terrorists....!"

Your reply should be: "Republicans are queer!"

Seriously though, they are sooo corrupt at this point, that they KNEW a pedophile was in their midst, but rather than risk losing a possible house seat, they swept it under the rug, AND - This Foley- A-hole - was helping direct the legislation and committee on missing and exploited children! - Sick dude....

Not only that but after the story "blew" he checked into rehab saying booze made him do it, and he's gay because he was molested.....

Asshole... Republican spin is such that they dare equivocate being gay to molestation in all cases, and being a boozer made him hanker for young boys? WTF?

Now, I don't want to imply that being gay is the issue at all... I think you find love wherever you find love. And that's awesome... that's human...

Republicans though as a group are so completely open to discrimination when it comes to homosexuality, then they pray to Jesus some liberal commie won't make it illegal to buy an assault rifle - the key word in their flawed argument is - ASSault - not defense....

You guys remember the gay porn conservative reporter the whitehouse was paying to lob softball questions to the prez last year? Then when his pics were located on gay porn sites, they fired him, and refused to answer any questions about paying reporters for "fluff" pieces.

Kinda like that wiretap thing, by asking questions about our government, and pedophiles guarding and protecting exploited and missing children, we are emboldening the terrorists.

Maybe the next line they should use is: We're fighting the pedophiles in congress, so you don't have to fight them at home, unless of course, your child is unfortunate enough to be a page running errands for said pedophiles.

My point is this...

Not all Democrats or Liberals are babykilling, godless, hippie, tree-hugging, gay lawyers, with therapists, medical mary jane, and elitest attitudes. We don't all want to burn flags or make love with Osama.

Although sometimes it seems like it. Republican spin is such, that I'm scared to death of my fucking self... It's cool though, I got me some duct tape and plastic wrap, Just like the department of homeland security said I should... Sound kinky? And ineffective?

Republicans are queer!

Does anyone know what terror color of the rainbow we're at....?

Tom Ridge - gay!

See, let's stay on message - Republicans are queer! It doesn't matter if personally you're queer, or not. If you are queer just say to whoever questions you, that you were republican, but came out of the closet and quit hating yourself.

Liberals are inclusive. Remember "Republicans ARE QUEER!"

It just doesn't seem elitist to question these pricks who are so obviously full of crap and think the majority of the american people are buying what they continue to sell.

And, I know all Republicans aren't gay, homophobic, militant robot, C student hacks, with old money, Jesus is my co-pilot bumper stickers, and Crackers... They aren't all in-bred, rich assholes......

Many of them actually vote against their own economic interests, because they think that someday they may become rich assholes....

Although, I do subscribe to the theory that most conservatives are in fact assholes.

In summation tonight, I'm proud to be an american, but you assholes who started this war in IRAQ - why don't you guys and Lee Greenwood stand beside each other fucking today - Just like the G-Damn song, but do it over there, where everybody get's assault rifles....

Bring the kids home.

Vote in November.....

J

Queen for a day.....

So, I got e-mail.... From several people... about my last post... I was just having a day, and sometimes I just don't think I can do it. I type it, cause if I don't I'll explode. I'm/We're peachy.
Moving on...

Bryan, a close friend of mine and chameleon guru, got attacked for the first time this week, I consider this a "christening" of sorts and kinda funny.

BTW, R&C have your people call my people and put us on effing schedule or risk ex-communication...

On further thought and review this blog should be titled when Chameleons, Weasels, Anacondas, and the US Fish and Wildlife service attacks.

UPDATE: Kenny - (In your head use Robert Stacks's voice from that "Unsolved Mysteries" tv show - trench coat, smoke and all... while reading the following.)

Kenny, 36, Pot Smoker - Re-enactment....

Vanished, but called "friend"explaining he was living with some new friends, "was nearly out of minutes on his cell phone" and was sick of taking his 80 year old parents, "Shit!" Current whereabouts unknown last seen in a white ice cream truck, make/model unknown late 80's, American. If you have information - keep it to yourself.

I'm happy we broke it off clean anyway, but I can't say I won't miss him a little.

My friend Sarah - not WIF, although they have the same B-day, wierd, got a new baby weasel/ferret, I could have gotton it for her cheaper... But she sent me pics and it's very cute, and apparently weasels like bath toys...? I gather this from some rather odd weasel websites and her photos... hehe...

She and let's call him "Adam" to protect his identity, have multiple weasels. Now, having worked in the Animal Biz on and off for a good portion of my life, I have tried to impart upon her the cold hard facts, that ferrets never die a natural death... Seriously, think about it, have you ever heard of a ferret dying of old age.... Maybe being squished, or lost or eaten or maybe you have worked at a petshop where breeder ferrets were bought because they were cheaper for the owner to purchase, and you had to use a chain-mail glove to reach into the cage to feed them, and subsequently got attacked on a daily basis and ended up setting them free (at said owners request) in Nacogdoches, wherein the (Wild Ferrets) began attacking random college students (who called the cops), and your employer is fined by the city and the weasels are captured and are fed to anacondas, but dying of old age...? You never hear about that happening.

Well, I'm here to report I think S&A will actually set a record and it's quite possible a ferret will truly die of old age, if said ferrets remain in their care... From what I gather she's nuerotic in her care of her/their weasels and spends a great deal of money on weasel "check-ups. Props to her...

Other news, my wife and I got our DBA, TAX ID, Import/Export License, and finished paying off our breeding Amazon Basin Emeralds this week. Also, I bring in my first African shipment or at least get my first CITES permits on Monday, could be a week after before the shipment arrives, but first I have to go through USFW to make sure the paperwork is legit, now I only have 1274 things left on my to do list. Fuckin' A.

My kid, the one who needs a blog, asked the wif and I who "Jesus" was recently... We are into the "So, what do you think.." school of parenting... So when I asked Rhett, "Well, who do you think Jesus is?" His reply was beautiful...

Rhett says "Jesus was a singer..." and "He doesn't bite."

I'll leave you with this. Because I it made me laugh and I think I'll be buying it....

http://www.mcphee.com/items/11554.html

What the world needs now...

"is another folk singer like I need a hole in my head!"

Note to reader: If your looking for humour, you'd better put on a Stephen Wright CD, not reading this crap, at least not today.

Interestingly enough those words were written by "David Lowery" lead singer of the band "cracker" and a major creative force in the band "Camper Van Beethoven." I'm probably dating myself -in terms of age- here a bit, but it pretty much sums up my feeling on life in general today.

He himself, was nothing more than a modern day, self deprecating folk singer caught up in mid 90's alt rock.

I kinda had the feeling from an outsiders perspective, especially after listening to "EuroTrash Girl" on repeat for ages, that he, like me, always felt like a failure. Didn't matter, his success, just always seemed like he was trying to meet a personal goal that couldn't be personally met.

Today, I'm feeling like that. See I've never succeded at anything. Truth be told, my whole persona is bullshit. Today was the WIF's birfday. I couldn't summon a party, and the present "I" got her was a bedroom set, comforter, pillows, sheets, that she picked out, and put on layaway, at Marshalls, months ago.

I'm not a great dad, I only hope that R and E inherit their mothers traits, and not my bullshit.

Don't get me wrong, I try, but sometimes, trying just isn't enough, and I don't have the answers, I'm a prick, who spends too much time in his head, problem is, I just don't know how to get out...

You know I'd kill for my kids, friends, and family, I just don't know if I'm worth their time...

And sometimes I don't know that I'm worth mine....

It's true that I am 'good' at some things, but I am a master at 'nothing'... I have actually succeeded at nothing in my life... EVER. I truly have no idea why she (WIF) still hangs around.

Here is some interesting shit, I have been hospitalized 5 times for mental - (let's just call a duck a duck) for losing my mind. I recently lost my job, have no idea, whether my new business will be successfull, and have given nobody including myself any reason to trust, or believe that I can actually do this.

Sometimes, tonight especially, I feel like a caricature of myself, a lie, an actor, who plays a part, that people think is funny and tragic at the same time. I'm the guy with the "verbal tick", who occasionally is fun to laugh with, but sometimes inside , I'm just... I'm just that little kid scared as hell, and hoping it'll be over soon.

I love my family, my friends, my children, but if the truth be known.... I'm little, small, insignificant, and ego-centric. I'm a sheep in lambs clothing.... I am not good enough for my family. I am a terrible provider, a farce, and a weight.

And despite all that, she loves me.... And they love me... She believes in me.... Would someone please speak to her! Seriously!

On a side note my dad and my step-mom are going to see the OLD 97s at Stubbs in Austin tomorow, pretty cool.

My sister is the greatest, and I hope that she, Jerry and Peyton are well. My mom is in town, or rather Oklahoma and I love her, and to all of my friends "I love you also" ....

I just don't know if maybe someone should tell WIF, that she really deserves better... I know she does!

Funny thing is this is probably "news" to -NO-ONE- just my realization that I'm probably never gonna be that guy that I had always -hoped- to be. REAL........

A real good husband, father, provider, friend, lover, confidant, and most of all someone my children repect, because I earned it, not because I'm their father.....

Rhett, I love you, Evan I love you, Sarah, I love you.

S - Sorry about your birthday, I'll try and make it up to you.

BTW
Wilco, was tonight-UNMPWESDSLF and L_Bo went, hope they got me a t-shirt!

Not a funny post huh? but honest, at least with myself...